Sunday, January 27, 2013

"Skinny" Pants!!!

I'm sure that every woman has a pair of "skinny" pants. You know, pants from the skinny days that you keep in your closet "just in case". Since we're moving back to Idaho soon, I decided to go through my closet and get rid of the stuff that I never wear. Once I became a mom, my clothing has mostly consisted of yoga pants and t-shirts I got from various running events or to support a sport team. With this being said, there are quite a few things I can get rid of.

While going through my stack of dress pants from my teaching days, I came across my "skinny" pants. My "just in case" pants, if you will. These pants were bought at a time that I was very depressed. My first husband and I were separated and I was living at home at the age of 25 while I student taught in my hometown. Never had I felt more like a failure. My diet consisted of nothing but random pieces of comfort chocolate and maybe some white Zinfandel. My exercise consisted of opening the before-mentioned chocolate. Needless to say, I lost a lot of weight really quickly. I felt disgusting. I bought the pants and was so shocked that they fit that I ran out of the dressing room to show my mom and made her guess the size because I had never been that size before. Life got better or at least I tried to believe it would. I started eating meals again with all my chocolate and would randomly jog or play volleyball with the varsity girls I coached. It didn't take me long to not fit in the "skinny" pants anymore. I think I wore them once or twice before I realized breathing was important. Ha!

Fast forward to today...My situation couldn't be more different. I'm in a healthy and happy marriage with a beautiful baby girl to keep me busy. I work out at least five days a week and try to eat clean most of the time. I'm at my lowest weight since middle school but not because I'm ignoring (read: abusing) my body, but because I'm trying to keep it in the best working order I can. I know that I weigh ten pounds less than my pre-baby weight and my pants are all big, so I decided to try on the "skinny" pants out of curiosity. They freakin' fit!!! Like before, I ran out to tell the nearest person, my husband. I must say, this felt really good. I know that I earned that size. I know that I can maintain that size without sacrificing my health (or sanity).

I broke my vow to never take a picture of myself in the mirror and took one. I even took one of the tag and was all prepared to post these photos with this blog. I stopped myself because that number is my journey. Not yours. Your get-healthy goal size may be a 14 right now. It may be a 2. The key is not to compare yourself to others because your journey is different. Recognize that, embrace it, and set the goal. Let me know when you make your goal so I can celebrate with you. For now, I'll be celebrating with a cup of mint hot chocolate. Cheers!

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the post Ayla! Since about November I've been working out really hard and trying to eat better (food is my weakness). I've been working out with a friend who is in THE BEST shape. She's totally Bad-A. For a long time I've compared myself to her, and even though I've improved immensely, I'm not her. It was getting me down for awhile. I cleaned out my closet the other day too, but I'm kinda the opposite. I'm in my "someday" jeans now (for a while now) and it's felt SO good! They're not as small as I want to be, but I'm getting there. As I cleaned out my closet I found all the jeans I used to wear regularly and tried them on. Not a better feeling in the world! Those puppies were HUGE!

    Thanks for reminding me to stay on track with me! Love your blog! (I'm a stalker) ;)